Bob McGoogle

A guide to live by......
2002-04-28

He's Just A Guy.........

Girls, did you ever ask someone "Why doent my boy EVER clean up after himself?" Or maybe you were upset that he never asks how your feeling or how your day was like you do him? And then response from that person your talking to is ALWAYS, "Hes just a guy!" Like guys are some kind of retards who can be excused for all that they do or don't for the mere fact that they are male? What is this? You have a penis therefore you arent responsible for anything? Did it ever enter your little brain that he does this just to get your dumb ass to do all this shit for him? When he acts too stupid or cops out, we always chalk it up to him being male. What are we telling girls? It is time to stop this madness. Instead of stabbing him to death follow these simple steps, they can be re-directed for other uses I may not have mentioned.

Here it is..Leah's guide to fixing your screwed up boy..

If hes leaving his clothes around for you to pick up-warn him 3 times..thats all 3 times... after that commence throwing them into the garbage. Once hes run out of socks and T's he'll be like "Wheres all my clothes going?" Then you tell him that you will continue to throw them out till he learns to pick them up off the floor, walk the 2 steps to the frickin laundry hamper and throw them in. He will of course get angry that you've thrown them away so here is what you do...tell him.."Ok I'll stop doing that if you pick up my clothes for one day to see how annoying it is." If he agrees which he has to or youll cut his lazy ass off, then he can see how fucking lame it is to clean up after other people whom you didnt give birth to. Now if your boy won't put his dishes in the sink or if he puts them in the sink but wont walk the 2 steps to the dishwasher you- leave them out in a pile right next to his bed..thats right pile them up and put them next to his bed..everytime he leaves one in the sink..eventually the smell will get so bad he will be forced to wash them or load them into the dishwasher because of the smell. But I know some of you are like "Ewe thats gross, what about my nose?" Well chicky this is why girls are tougher them boys...SUCK IT UP WUSS! Now if you cant get him to help you clean- one sunday while your supposed to be cleaning and doing the laundry and hes playing video games instead of helping, act like you have the worst cramp of your life..your crawling to bed..tell him people are supposed to come check the apartment tomorrow for some crap...make it up...and it has to be clean! Its up to him! Your dying! Ouch!! The pain! Its all up to him! And if hes still reluctant.....say the magic words...."Its gonna cost us a whole lotta money if they find any violations!" That will do the trick. Before you know it he'll be scrubbing the floors.

Ok heres the hard part-He wont listen to you. So why do you listen to him then? When he comes home blah blahin' about some crap at work or the bar, zone out!!!! Stare at the tv, stare at the cat, whatever! If he won't listen to you then why bother? When he asks you why you aren't listening to him say.."Its annoying isnt it?" Then walk away. Ok folks thats my advice for my theory known as "Hes Just a Guy". Any questions or comments send them to my myass.com shanks! P.S This doesn't apply to ALL men, because some have been trained correctly. :-)

Man I'm gonna get eaten alive by Mike for this one! Hahahahahah I'd like to thank Miss Kat for bringing this subject to my attention.

HAPPY LINK TIME!

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