Bob McGoogle

Im a Toys 'r Us kid!

So yeah Ive been concerned with getting older lately cuz my b-day is a few short months away. Turning 24 is a scarey thing. It means Im not really a kid anymore and Id like to be. I dont ever want to grow up. Grown-ups lose that fire that sparks only when you are young to start a revolution and burn your bra or whatever you like to burn. It seems like older people or "middle aged" people just give up on that fire and turn into tradionalist types. I guess its hard to hold on after so long. Its like those really great ideas you get about changing the world that only seem to happen when you are young. Or just a great idea like one I had. I have a bladder but it was meant for the elderly. I have to get up every few hours and piss my brains out at night. This cuts into my sleep and some very interesting dreams, I came up with a solution! You know how girls use plugs or Tampons as they are called...well how about a urine absorber? Yes! Heres my slogan!

You jab this thin stick of cotton up your pee hole and all night it will absorb your over active bladder's pee! For 8 straight hours you will sleep undisturbed! If you are awoken,it wont be because of your bladder full of painful pressure to pee! We guarantee that you will not be distrubed for 8 hours! The urine absorber can hold up to 3 gallons of pee! Yes even the most overactive bladders will be kept empty till morning! Just pull on the string very gently so as to not rip out your insides and the huge cotton stick full of your pee will slide out easily! ( This is not guaranteed because of different amounts of pee in each bladder, your pee stick my be so full it must be surgically removed) So if your tired of pissing your brains out every 5 mintues call us! AND! If you act now we will throw in for free, the "Ooops I crapped my pants" diapers for free! ( Thank you SNL)

So yeah thats my idea. NOW how many 45 year olds do you know who can be that brillant? Yup thats what I thought. I hate growing up.


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