Bob McGoogle

Its the little things that make life worth living...

It's a beautiful thing to fart and sneeze at the same time. I feel cleansed. So I'm super broke and it's Christmas time, my favorite time of year, but it's ok. I burned my thumb this morning with the curling iron, it hurt bad. What we chicks do for boys to think we're pretty. So I hope you all have a super sweet turkey day. I have bad gas today. Jesus that stinks. I could kill someone with this gas. Whew. Hot, super hot.

Shit I forgot...

Yup I got a job and THEY have internet. Run and hide kids..Bob's back.

Tis' the season.

So Christmas is coming. Every year about this time I start to reflect on the year and really think about the big questions in life. There is one that keeps coming back to me. "What happens to the poop?" So those people who like to shat on eachother for sexual purposes (I can only assume), what happens to the poop? Do they shat then smear it in the others chest? Or do they clean it up and sit back happy that they actually got to poop on someone elses chest? Is it more important to poop on the chest or play with it after you pooped? Who's job is it to clean the poop up? The one who was shat on or the shatter? Ahh, I love the holiday seasons.

Beer me or slap it up with some vodka?

So ambition is the word for the day for me. Ambition is very important huh? Tony sure thinks so. He feels like I haven't reached my full potential. He wants me to start using my skills and putting them to good use instead of just wasting them on the toliet. I'm scared, this could take away from my precious Sims time or enjoying my pooping experience.
So while I'm typing this I'm drinking a beer and I had some back wash come up. I remembered what it was like to barf up beer. I actually dont mind puking up beer because it doesn't burn quite as bad as vodka does. Vodka hurts my head but it goes down easier and makes me all smiley faster. It's a difficult choice but everybody has to make it. Sorry i locked my diary, it wont appen again. I was having drama with a boy. Yup, the one I used to write all those pissed off entries about. I finally got my head out of my ass and found a super perfect guy that was standing right in front of me, and his name is Tony-bolgna or Howdy doody as I call him. I'm marrying him and I can't believe he wants me, He actually wants me, it's nutty. He may have brain damage who knows. This is the right one I've been waiting for. I can't believe that I'm getting married, the chick who swore weddings were death for women, enslavement. Well it's not quite the same wedding you may be thinking. It's gonna be on a beach with just the two of us. Then we come back here for a huge ass bash at the Magic Bag. I just cant believe Tony loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me. Maybe I should have his head checked. Just kidding. Oh God, I gotta poop. P.S. I'm sorry I haven't wrote in awhile but right now I don't have internet access right now but I will again soon then you're all screwed.


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